Playing The Game
Written on Jun 17


After a two month writing hiatus, I've returned with some topics to talk shit about. The first topic on my list is aptly titled "Playing the game". So without further ado, let me begin this rant by once again stating the fact that people EQUAL SHIT, and corporations run by people EQUAL BIGGER SHIT.

Everybody knows that in order to get what you want in this world you have to do something called "play the game". For instance, if I want a promotion at work, I have to over-exaggerate my positive qualities and down-play my negative ones to a manager (who already has his opinion made up about me regardless of what bullshit I spew to him), and then I have to get the approval and support of my co-workers.

At a normal job, this could be a walk in the park. All you would have to do is put on a nice suit (or dress), disguise your true intentions with a half-ass confident smile, and manipulate anybody who stands in your path of getting that promotion into thinking your the best.

I'm sorry, but this BULLSHIT. B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T.

Why do I have to manipulate somebody to move up? My performance and work ethic should speak for itself, especially in a competitive work place. But in this modern-day society, it's more or less who's ass do you have to kiss to get where you want to go. Work ethic means absolutely shit compared to who you know or what you can do for someone else.

My current boss actually told me to be "classy". I asked him what his definition of classy was and he responded, "not being blunt about what you think and feel". More or less, instead of telling my supervisor that he is piece of shit and a waste of oxygen, I should instead say, "that we have a personality conflict". TELL ME, WHAT FUCKING GOOD WOULD THAT DO? All I'm doing is dancing around my true feelings. If I told the retard what I really thought of him, I'd feel alot better about myself. In fact, I would feel really fucking good, so much so, that I would be smiling from ear to ear.

My idiotic supervisor actually asked me whether or not I liked him and I blurted out "No, I don't like you at all", and I actually got in trouble for that. You know what really got me in trouble? My honesty. Instead of talking shit about the man, I gave him a direct answer to his face using just enough neutral words to not get myself fired. I thought I did the right thing...but then I remembered, I wasn't being "classy". Oops, my bad.

Basically, the moral of this entire article is that honesty will get you no where in the work force. Lying, cheating, and manipulation tactics will get you wherever you need to go. If "playing the game" will get me a $5/hr raise, why the fuck not? I'll just put my pride aside and put my poker face on when I'm at work just like all the other soul-less robots.

Can anybody detect my thinly veiled sarcasm here?

Work-related translations!



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