High School Is A Joke
Written on Feb 12


Is it just me, or was high school a waste of fucking time?

Aside from meeting girls and making temporary friendships, high school didn't teach me a damn thing about the real world. Ironically enough, isn't high school supposed to prepare you for the real world?

I was prepared for the real world, all right. Not that the real world was any different from high school life, but out of high school I was a sitting duck swimming in a pond of sharks. I entered the work force with an above-average knowledge about British literature, 12th century philosophers, and the Transcendalist era. I also remembered some Algebra equations, too. Crap like this will not benefit me in the real world. The only time that information is useful is during drunken sessions of Kings where I ask people random general-ed questions.

Tell me, how the FUCK does knowing bullshit like Algebraic equations prepare me for the real world? It doesn't prepare me for anything. It's just filler knowledge to extend a general-ed curriculum and prepare kids for corporate enslavement.

Yes, corporate enslavement. My buddy CJ was explaining that public high school is merely a breeding ground for future corporate drones. Here's my proof: teachers will punish you if you're tardy, talking out of turn, or generally being a nuisance to them or their class. Isn't this what happens in corporate America? If I'm late, I'm punished. If I speak my mind or go against the norm, I'm punished.

Can you see where I'm going with this?

Teachers in high school still want kids to raise their hand to go the fucking bathroom. High schools want to develop a corporate breed of "yes" men who ask permission to do things. The top corporate brass want the bottom line of corporate drones to consist of followers that are easily trained, well behaved, and brainwashed to routine. Trust me, it sounds like a crazy theory. But try being a free thinker in a corporate environment. I bet you won't get very far.

But what if you want to follow a different path in life? What if corporate enslavement is not in your divine master plan? It's nearly impossible to survive in this cutthroat economy nowadays, yet kids are oblivious to the perils of independence and survival.

What high school kids need is a real world course that explains the importance of credit, filling out job applications, opening a checking/savings account, bills, putting on a presentation for power-hungry bosses, and everything that kids fresh in the 'real world' need to learn. Not bullshit like writing a "5 paragraph essay with a thesis and conclusion". Who has ever needed to write a 5 paragraph essay in the real world? Nobody.

I'd be a great fucking teacher for a class like that. I'm serious. I know what it's like to step out of the front door blind-folded to the world. It sucks. Sure, I learned alot through experience, but I would have been way more successful had I been educated about the necessity of credit, among other things. I really didn't understand the importance of credit until I was turned down for a college loan. I didn't even know about 'co-signers' until I needed one. And getting a job... well, that's a whole 'nother story.

In hindsight, I think high school teachers and principals need to rethink the importance of what they're teaching kids these days. Instead of wasting class time studying Shakespeare, educators should tackle real world issues and personalize with their students to prepare them for what lies ahead. Because not everybody has rich parents that send them to an Ivy league college.


[If any principals or teachers would like to hire me to teach "Real World 101", I'm available Mon-Sat, 8am-5pm. Trust me, I actually have a curriculum. Please just excuse my vulgar language, combative attitude, and piercings. Thank you.]



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